i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
