I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize