Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize