i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
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