all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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