so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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