THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
