I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
As shirtless as possible
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize