I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
She even gives head with a lisp.
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If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
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I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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