you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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