AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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