Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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