yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
