From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
