Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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