I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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