hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Randomize
