I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
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