Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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