Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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