My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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