I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
