It's like God shit irony all over that family
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
