So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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