Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
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