tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize