I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
