I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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