You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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