Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
