Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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