I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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