And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
She swung at the pinata with crutches
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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