How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
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What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
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I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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