I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
