We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
