I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
That reminds me...we need to get swords
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize