eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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