Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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