I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
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I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
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The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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