I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
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