There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
