yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
