I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
