what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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