I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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