So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
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his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
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you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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