thus making me awesome and them whores
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
