I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I have aggressive nipples.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
