I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Randomize