question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
that is very illegal...i love you.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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